five thoughts i had my first 24 hours in beijing.

I had many thoughts my first 24 hours in Beijing, but these are my top five.

1. Holy shit there is a Walmart.
i love new york woman dance
On a scale from 1 to Alabama, I wonder how Walmarty the shoppers are?


2. Oh, the maid left me a hotel business card.  Oh, nope, it’s an asian hooker card. 

 toddlers tiaras dance

Beijing is just like Vegas!


3. That’s a child defecating on the concrete. 

Emma Stone Ew Face

Ten feet out of my hotel I witnessed a toddler pooping on the sidewalk.  I would like to believe a beautiful flower blossomed from the natural fertilizer.


4. I love these men who roll up their normal length shirts into crop tops.

Nick Cage wink

I’m only disappointed in the lack of stomach hair.


5. Thank GOD this subway has air conditioning.

Sweaty Soccer Player

I’m going to have to deal with being permanently moist for the next couple of months.


My first day here I went to the Forbidden City and watched about four episodes of Orange is the New Black.  Well rounded day.




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